Literature Analysis #2

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood

"To Thine Own Self Be True"

   The past few years have been known especially for encouraging individuality, focusing on oneself, staying true and not letting anyone say different. This message has been around for centuries. And the hackneyed phrase "be true to yourself" has captured the attention of many insecure individuals who need reminding that they can only be the best versions of themselves. People often appeal to this instruction when they feel defensive and want to state their opinion. They want others to know that they stand by their morals. And that's exactly what Hamlet does throughout the play; he remains true to his resolve and mission, remembers his roots and his father, and doesn't let anyone veer him off course.
   Hamlet never let himself be fooled whether by his own fault or others in the castle. He knew his mission, his motive, and he sought to fulfill it. While his confidence may have wavered, his resolve never did. Hamlet struggled with the task of killing Claudius, often chastising and berating himself for acting like a coward. But in the end (with a few bumps in the road), he was able to accomplish It was up to him to survive the pain of his father's death and prevail over Claudius. Hamlet's mother didn't genuinely. Polonius remained loyal to Claudius. Polonius was merely an ingratiating adviser who did Claudius's bidding, doing so throughout the play. He sent spies to keep an eye on Hamlet ultimately to keep Claudius safe, making sure Hamlet wouldn't pull some crazy stunt.
   Throughout the play, the feeling of frenzy and paranoia is tangible. Hamlet trying to kill Claudius, Claudius trying to send Hamlet away, Polonius trying to watch his kids and still keep up with Claudius's scheming antics. And yet, through all the craziness, each character does his best to follow through with what he had planned.

David Whyte and Robert Francis

Working Together by David Whyte and Summons by Robert Francis

   Poetry: the universal expression of knowledge and self. No matter what language, type or form, all poems carry a message. Working Together and Summons evokes a sense of fellowship and camaraderie from the reader. One person can only do so much alone, only feel and experience insular emotions and moments by himself. And with the help of others, that one person can open his eyes to "a whole new world" and find a greater truth in it.
   In Summons, the narrator talks to an unknown person, asking him or her to keep the narrator awake so they can watch the Northern Lights together, so they can admire nature together and appreciate each other's presence. The narrator wants to be woken up so he and his friend can watch the wonders of nature that are bigger than the both of them. He wants to see something wonderful, and those sights will reshape his perspective and thinking. He will have been changed for the better. The narrator gets to share those few moments with someone he cares about. He needs the motivation that everyone else needs to get out of bed, and he shall be rewarded with irreplaceable and priceless memories and mementos.
   And in Working Together, Whyte talks about how the world and the people affect us, how there's something greater out there waiting to be discovered and invented. When people work together, great things can happen. They can experience new things, great moments. The intangible contains some phenomenal that, when molded by different hands, can create something momentous. This message is shared by Francis's Summons, that with the help of at least one person, the beautiful elements of life can be discovered and marveled at. The narrator wouldn't have seen that "the Northern Lights are on," or that "the clouds are doing something to the moon..." if his friend hadn't persuaded him to go outside. That camaraderie or sense friendship helped both of them experience something completely beyond their control. And like in Working Together, the coalition of people can achieve something that just one person couldn't do by himself.
   With the help of others, one person can transcend the boundaries that confine him to solitude to experience something more meaningful than if left alone. Working together, whether with one person or seven, can help make new memories and reshape perspectives. We are shaped by the world and the people around us. And individuals can unite to see, imagine, experience, produce something never seen and done before. They can "work together in common cause, to produce the miraculous."
 
 

Working Together by David Whyte Remix

With Ashlyn Bishop, Brenissa Flores, Elizabeth Smith, Melissa Sobczak, and Victoria Tonascia

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1BeodFHlvIF1ImNxliVaQdK6tjo4dCVFpveSCJslWUb4/edit#slide=id.p

Unappreciated Education

   Let me first say that yes, I should be writing my other essays (Hamlet and poetry) but to be honest, I'd rather write about ↑ this topic because it's something that I've thought about for a while now. And I thought what better way to express my thoughts and ask questions (and also procrastinate even more on the two essays that I have to write) than to do it here.
   It's been on my mind lately that why do we always complain about going to school? "Why am I here?" "What's the point?" "I hate it." "I wish I could be at home." "Such a waste of my time." Every single student has said something like this at least once in his/her life. Yet kids in third world countries, especially in Africa and Asia, crave and so deeply desire the education that we in America take for granted. I see documentaries on TV or articles and pictures on the internet about children in dirty clothes gathered under a freeway overpass or in an abandoned building learning the simplest math or English from a random adult who volunteered or was deemed a good enough teacher. What these kids wouldn't do for the free education we have here in the USA and other countries! So why is it that we don't appreciate it as much as them? I mean, don't get me wrong, I understand the value of education and want to continue for many years but I have done my fair share of complaining about not wanting to go, wanting to spend my time at home doing other things. And even in general, why do we take for granted the things we have in our daily lives? Maybe because we get so accustomed to having them that we lose sight of their importance and the trouble it took to get them?
   I honestly feel bad when I compare the trouble kids in Nigeria, for example, have to go to of walking miles to get to school compared to the six minute drive I have to get to mine. And yet I know that those little Nigerian kids would appreciate my experience so much more than I enjoy it myself. And I also know that money is a factor, setting up the school, finding teachers, building the classrooms, furnishing and equipping. It takes loads of money to get a school going, so I understand why education is so hard to come by. But what I don't understand is why we hate it, or the kids undervalue it so much here when it's so much more valued and esteemed by kids in poor countries. I think that as kids/ teenagers we think we have so many other important things to do with our lives than sit at a desk all day and learn... trigonometry (which is actually a useless subject). We think that we're so cool, and we have all these cool things to do that are even cooler than going to school. Many of us don't understand and appreciate just how lucky we are to have free education.
   So while I don't have a full and complete answer to my question, I do have somewhat of a solution, a hard one but a solution nonetheless. We have to learn to appreciate what we have, how lucky we are to have a public education system so that everyone can go to school, no matter how poor. I wish I could just magically transport a fully equipped, functioning school to the third world countries, or even swap out the useless, never-going-to-see-the-value-in-school kids for the ones who would. I shake my head at the kids who just take up space, not fulfilling their potential, just letting the minutes (and their lives) slowly tick away. It's frustrating and saddening.

Intro to Poetry (Working Together by David Whyte)

1. The title is significant because it tells the central theme of the poem; it's about the world shaping us and us shaping the world, how working together can produce miraculous things. Working together produces something better than what a single individual can do alone. 
2. The tone of the poem is optimistic, "working together in common cause, to produce the miraculous."
3. My mood when I read this is also optimistic and hopeful. Hopeful for a future in which there is more camaraderie that can also create something better for society. 
4. There is not an obvious shift. But the first line is a bit aloof, stating that we shape the world and vice versa. Then it goes on to become more optimistic, how we can work as a team, how doing so led to incredible things and inventions. 
5. The theme of the poem is that everyone working together can create something bigger than working alone; have faith even in what we can't see because they still shape us into the people we are.  

Hamlet (The Madman?)

   Madness, synonymous with insanity; mentally deranged. But to be called insane is a serious accusation, and Hamlet is anything but. On the contrary, Hamlet possesses such cunning, witty skills that allow him to sneak right under King Claudius's nose and expose him as the dirty backstabber he really is. Hamlet is an angry, upset prince with almost everybody out to get him. And while a few of his actions are questionable, there is no denying that Hamlet is far from a mad man. He has too much cleverness and precision, intelligence and sensibility.

   From the time that Prince Hamlet was paid a visit by his late father's ghost who revealed his true murderer, the young heir to the throne never wavered in his mission to avenge Hamlet Sr. And while seeing a ghost might be grounds for accusation of madness, at the beginning of the play, guards Marcellus, Horatio, and Bernardo also witnessed the Ghost of the late King Hamlet passing right by them. But if the Ghost is just a figment of Hamlet's imagination, a projection of his subconscious, how were Marcellus, Horatio, and Bernardo able to see the Ghost too without being called mad men themselves? So while the state of the Ghost is unknown and questionable, Hamlet's ability to see it doesn't make him crazy. Rather it reveals his humanity, morals, and the anguish he feels for his father's death; not characteristic of a lunatic. And while it may seem less than reasonable to take orders from a ghost that may or may not be just a figment of the imagination, the request is justified . In the Bible, Exodus 21:23 states "...the punishment must match the injury: a life for a life," (one of many of Shakespeare's allusions to the Bible). Revenge in this form has lived for centuries before and after Hamlet's time. But while his taking orders from a ghost is cause for some concern, it merely means that Hamlet still carries his morals with him, his sense of right and wrong, something a crazy young man would rather lack.

   Hamlet does an excellent job of putting up a facade of craziness and passivity. He calculates his every move, weighs all his options, and makes sure no one- least of all Claudius- knows the true meaning of his actions. During Act 1 Scene 1 in the banquet, Hamlet first comes off as a (rightfully) cold and uncaring son. But during his first soliloquy, he exposes his genuine emotions- pain, rage, despair- making the audience sympathize with him. As the play progresses, the audience catches snippets and more soliloquies that give insight to Hamlet's plans and motives. But through all of that, he is very self- critical, berating and chastising himself when he hasn't actually killed Claudius yet, beats himself up about not crying about his father's death. The depth of Hamlet's character continues to grow and surprise the audience, ultimately showing that he is the very opposite of insane. 

  Hamlet is still a very complex character with all his warring emotions raging inside him. However, one thing that remains constant is his wit and cleverness. Hamlet fools everyone into believing that he is in fact a mad man, driven crazy by unfortunate circumstances. He knows that everyone in the castle will stop paying him much attention so he can swiftly move forth with his plan for vengeful murder. Hamlet is aware of the fact that no one will question the crazy prince whose father just died, so he acts the part to keep people's guards down. Lord Polonius doesn't fall for Hamlet's ploy and recruits a spy named Reynaldo to keep an eye on him. But the perceptive Hamlet realizes Reynaldo's ulterior motive and allegiance to Polonius, adviser to King Claudius. So rather than out Reynaldo and confront him, Hamlet still plays the wacky prince who calls people names and stays in the background knowing that Reynaldo will report back to Polonius and retain the misconception of being a weirdo. 

   Once he discovers the truth that Claudius killed King Hamlet, Hamlet resolves to exact his revenge. And while Hamlet harshly criticizes and beats himself up for not taking action quicker and rather acting like a coward, he never once wavers in his determination to avenge his father's death. He even goes through the trouble of putting on a play that would elicit a reaction from King Claudius (and Queen Gertrude) to confirm his murdering King Hamlet. But everyone is critical of themselves; it's human nature. So Hamlet reprimanding himself isn't all that strange. At times he can be harsh, telling himself that he's a great coward and emotionless son. But all that is from the intense feelings that bubble inside him. 

   There is one specific instance that Hamlet no doubt acts unnecessarily rash and harsh: when he absolutely blows up at Queen Gertrude. Granted, she wasn't acting her best in front of him, but that doesn't justify Hamlet cruelly insulting her. On the other hand, Hamlet had been holding in most of his feelings for a long time, and Gertrude's approach was just the catalyst of the explosion. Hamlet calls her nasty names, scolds her for marrying Claudius, acting like a terrible son. And while Gertrude hasn't been the best, Hamlet's actions and words towards her are unwarranted because she is still his mother. Polonius enters and gets stabbed by Hamlet who acts nonchalant and uncaring about it. But Polonius was always an ingratiating scoundrel so he wasn't completely undeserving. But that was one of the rare times Hamlet acted a little less than in control and "normal". 

   The category of insanity can be an ambiguous one, but it is safe to say that Hamlet does not fit in it. He is far too calculated and smart. Hamlet fools everyone in the castle so he can get around them to kill King Claudius. He carefully plans out his steps, evades being sent away to England, even directs a play to confirm what he already knows so he can get justification. These calculated actions are not characteristic of madness. He knows what to say under pressure, how to get out of sticky situations and keep the impression that he's merely a stewing prince with no other motives. He has been able to bypass everyone so far, not an easy feat. So Hamlet, a mad man? More like Prince Hamlet the genius. 

Hamlet Act 3 over-/ re-view

An overview of Act 3

Hamlet Act 2 Scene 1-2

Scene 1:

• Polonius wants Reynaldo to spy on Laertes but not tell anyone about knowing them
• "Your bait of falsehood takes this carp of truth." - meaning throw out a lit, and people will tell you the truth
• Polonius then talks to Ophelia to get her to spy on Hamlet
• Ophelia tells Polonius that he was in a very disheveled state when she saw him acting strangely, almost trying to make a move on her but she denied him

Scene 2:

• King Claudius and Gertrude pay Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to spy on Hamlet 
• Claudius knows that Hamlet is acting rash

Hamlet Act 1 Scene 3-5

Scene 3:

• Laertes is talking to his sister Ophelia, warning her to be wary of Hamlet since his duties are to the state, not to her
• Ophelia is just a young girl in love but Hamlet is the heir to the throne and has more important matters to deal with
• But in Laertes's warning, he himself is a hypocrite because he's not being careful
• Polonius enters to give advice to Laertes about his trip abroad and to talk to Ophelia about Hamlet; then Laertes leaves
• Polonius warns Ophelia about Hamlet like Laertes does, says not to think too much about Hamlet, pay no attention to his weird actions
• Polonius tries to instill values of independence, thinking before speaking, loyalty and honor, quality over quantity; but Polonius lacks a few morals himself

Scene 4 and 5: 

• Hamlet is talking with Horatio and Marcellus late at night when King Hamlet's ghost visits again
• A classic line: "Something is wrong in the state of Denmark." whenever something is wrong
• It is revealed that Claudius seduced Gertrude, leaving King Hamlet to let Claudius kill him
• King Hamlet is in purgatory because he wasn't allowed his last rights or atonement; he hasn't repented for his sins 
• It's not up to Prince Hamlet to punish Gertrude; she'll get her own comeuppance through her guilt, but it is his duty to avenge his father and kill Claudius
• "I have sworn't."- Hamlet, resolving to kill Claudius, putting immense weight on his shoulders, large obligation
• He's trying to be everything that everyone wants him to be: an obedient son to Gertrude and Claudius, a ready, dutiful Prince, an avenger to his deceased father
• Ghost leaves. "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." -Hamlet; meaning swear to never reveal the truth
• "The times is out of joint; O cursed spite that ever I was born to set it right" -Hamlet; he is battered by anger

"Hamlet" Acts 1 & 2 Interpretation

http://emoneypatel.blogspot.com/2014/10/interpretations-of-hamlet-act-1-2.html

With Imanie Patel, Hannah Hurd, Sierra Sanchez, Elizabeth Smith, Melissa Sobczak, Courtney Reyburn, Judith Lee, Victoria Tonascia, and Alyssa Oh.

Hamlet Act 1 Scene 1

• The guards are very wary and jittery, because the King just died
• Then they see the ghost of the deceased King, and they start freaking out, which is understandable
• They try asking its intentions but it doesn't speak- doesn't want to be disturbed
• Once the ghost leaves, the guards start talking about the King, his actions, the battle; they reminisce
• Horatio reveals insight about the late King Hamlet 
• Horatio, Bernardo, and Marcellus talk about the King, that they should tell Prince Hamlet they saw his father's ghost

Hamlet Act 1 Scene 2

• King Claudius is disgraceful man; he tries to act compassionate and mournful but all he cares about is the throne and his power. 
• Calling Prince Hamlet his son is inappropriate as is marrying his deceased brother's wife a month after his death
• Hamlet's first line basically means "Don't call me son; I don't like you." (I think I'll like Hamlet; his deadpan and cynicism is something I can relate to 

Vocabulary #6

Vocabulary list #6:

A Picture I Didn't Take...

Of a woman in a white dress, standing in front of an audience with a bouquet of freesias in her hands. The veil hides a single tear slowly rolling down her rosy cheek. The silence that descends upon the gathering is like a blanket tucking itself into the crowd. And the minister begins the service. When he finishes, the woman in the snowy gown lays down her bouquet then turns to walk down the aisle as the processional plays for the last time. She leaves behind the flowers- his favorite flowers- on the last part of him that will remain forever. The tombstone reads:

Here lies Phelps

A loving son, brother, & fiance

Green Eggs & Hamlet

a) I know that Hamlet has a lover named Ophelia. One of them drowns and dies. (Side note: I just got that ↑ pun; *facepalm*)
b) Shakespeare is one of the most famous, classic writers in literary history. He was from England, or somewhere in the UK. He wrote in iambic pentameter, which is a pain to read. He wrote tragedies and comedies, used many puns throughout his plays. His most famous play is "Romeo and Juliet."
c) Most students frown at Shakespeare because his work is so hard to read and understand. It's so vague; the readers have to spend so much time analyzing and picking apart each line to understand what he's saying. And his plays are depressing and sad. And frustrating. "Romeo and Juliet" was frustrating to read because their plan was flawed and stupid. "Julius Caesar" was depressing because he was literally stabbed in the back by his fellow Senate members. I actually don't really appreciate Shakespeare's work. Maybe I'm just reading the wrong plays, but I don't like the couple that I've read. I should try reading "Twelfth Night"; I think I'd like that one.
d) I think making the reading more interactive would be fun. I also think that somehow translating Shakespeare's Old English into a more common vernacular; that would make reading "Hamlet" a lot easier.

Character Study (2): Continuing Call to Action

[Just a side-note, I get carried away with creative writing assignments so my character study will be quite a bit longer than others, I think. And I worked on this part for a while.]

Vocabulary #5

Vocabulary list #5:

Canterbury Tales (2): What A Character

   Chaucer uses indirect characterization to describe all his characters, poking fun at them, beating around the bush. Yet he uses direct characterization at the same time, describing to the readers how the Merchant is in debt, how the Monk fancies material things, how the Cook is fat with an ulcer.
   In regards to indirect characterization of the Cook, Chaucer uses the Cook's dialogue to indirectly show the reader his personality and his values. Direct characterization: The Cook's story is told directly, with his physical features included.
   Tone: Chaucer's tone was satirical, making fun of the Cook's life. At first the Cook was happy just the way he was, but throughout the pilgrimage, people brought up all his faults which hurt his feelings. So the Cook lost his true personality and character, hiding it from everybody. Chaucer's voice in the narrator more encouraged the Cook to ignore and move past all of it and to get his character and integrity back.
   Chaucer's humor: more ironic, because the Cook was happy and content in the beginning, but then lost himself through the journey and his job. Chaucer made fun of how the Cook lost everything, how the Cook let other people get to him even though he was so content.

Character Study (1)

I just finished class, and I'm walking to the dining hall. My senile chemistry professor was blasting the heater even though it's 89 degrees outside. Crazy old man! I hope the dining hall still has that snow cone machine they put in a week ago. I don't know what it is about shaved ice with artificial fruit syrup on top that is so appealing, but it sounds superb right now.
As soon as I take my first step into the dining hall, the cool crisp air from the air conditioning hits me full blast from above. I take a second to soak it in, let it sink into my bones and fully wash over me. Even though summer has just turned to fall, the temperatures here in Stanford can still get pretty high, and I know the worst has still yet to come.
I have my fingers crossed as I make my way toward the back of the cafeteria where the snow cone machine should be and- huzzah!- it's still there! I quicken my step and reach for the last cup but a bigger hand comes out of nowhere and snatches it before I do. I turn around, ready to yell at whoever stole the cup, but I bite my tongue when I realize that I've come face to face- or rather face to chest- with a big, surly football player. I see this guy's Stanford polo shirt with the tree emblazoned on the breast pocket and football helmet under his arm, and I tilt my head all the way back to see his face, which has a frown on it.
We're both silent for a second before he says, "Oh, I'm sorry. You can have the last one." And he gives the snow cone cup to me.
I blink and dart my eyes to both sides then look back at him before asking, "Are you sure?"
He nods once then turns around and walks over to the ice cream machine instead.

Canterbury Tales (1)

We talked in class about the prologue before I actually read it about how Chaucer's characters contradict themselves. But I could only pick up on a few of those: the Cook, the Merchant, and the Monk. But the others, I didn't understand how they contradicted themselves.
It was also difficult to follow and understand; I think it's because the story has rhyming stanzas so I don't pay much attention to the actual content or try to read between the lines; but even when I try to analyze, I still don't fully understand. I know that a lot of different types of people have all gathered together to make their pilgrimage to Canterbury, and the first person to get there receives a free meal. But I also read at the end of the prologue, that whoever shares the best story shall be given a full meal for free also. What's up with that?
I would like to read more about the merchant's story- how he's in debt- and the Oxford student's story- why he's so Type A. I can't imagine them getting to Canterbury first. I don't like the Cook all that much; I doubt he'll make it to Canterbury first also.
I feel like Chaucer is too loquacious (?) but in a writing sense (what's the word for that? Too wordy?) But he makes it difficult to understand the plot because he puts in so much unnecessary information. Chaucer's character descriptions for some of his characters are too lengthy in my opinion. The pictures in the margins helped me gain a clearer picture of some of the characters.

Bede and Canterbury Tales notes

Bede (pg. 74-82)

Declaration of Learning Independence

What does that ↑ mean? Denotatively, it means that I will announce my self-sufficient gain of knowledge. And going off that, I think a "declaration of learning independence" is someone branching away from the group to forge his/her own path to learn. And learning comes in all ways and forms. I think that everyone can break away from the classroom setting and learn something new on their own.
I'd like to learn independently because I don't have the patience to deal with some of my peers; but at the same time, I also know that I'll always get side-tracked, distracted. Studying abroad, or even going to a foreign country to explore and learn about the culture, would be ideal. I enjoy new experiences, especially those that involve traveling, and I think that that involves independence.

Big Question(s)?

Where do dreams come from? How do we dream? And how do they serve as a window into an individual's character?- I've always been curious about dreams and what they mean, what the subconscious is trying to tell you. I've done a bit of research on my own in the past, but I'd like to look further.

Vocabulary #4

Vocabulary list 4

Literature Analysis #1

Atonement- Ian McEwan

Tone? I "tone" know!

↑ Like "I don't know." (I'm not that great at puns). Even though "tone" is something we learned in 8th grade, I still have trouble deciding the proper tone for a novel. I need a list of words to sift through, and I found a fairly good one for future reference. If any of you out there have the same trouble as me, maybe you'll appreciate this, maybe not. But it's here if you need it. (I know I do.)
 http://www.mshogue.com/AP/tone.htm

Harry's Alternative World

   I've decided to write about something completely different but one of my favorite things ever: Harry Potter. For those of you who don't really know me, I am an avid Harry Potter fan, an enthusiast of sorts. On Pinterest, I have a whole board dedicated to the series and its fandom. I read scenarios that might have taken place after the final battle, analyses of different events. But what makes me think the most is the alternative universes, especially what would have been if Harry's parents had not died, or if Neville had been chosen by Voldemort as a threat instead of Harry.
   Sometimes I think about how Harry's life would be different if Voldemort didn't exist and Harry's parents were still alive. I like to imagine a bubbly little boy raised by two loving parents (and three uncles) in Godric's Hollow among a wide variety of other wizarding families. James, Siruis, Remus, and Wormtail would tell Harry stories about their legendary pranks during their time at Hogwarts, teach some of them to him, pass on the legacy. Each Marauder would have a completely unique relationship with little boy.

No Respect! (Another Rant)

   As I observe society and its (mostly younger) people, I can't help but be appalled by the lack of respect towards others and towards themselves. The younger folk (preteens to early 20s) seem to have lost- or not been properly taught- respect. They walk around on their high pedestal, thinking they are so cool when in actuality, they are not. Preteens and teenagers, especially, need to get their heads out of the clouds (and out of their butts) and learn some good old fashioned respect! 

   When I hear the way some kids talk to elders- whom they should treat with civility-, I cringe because if I said the things they said or in the way they said it, I would get backhanded by my mom or dad before I could even close my mouth. I am in shock and disbelief when I hear kids talk to their parents with no regard for manners. And the parents are partly to blame because they never disciplined their children, but they need to be taught a lesson. Sometimes the parents even complain about their rowdy kids, but hello! it's your fault for not properly teaching them manners. It starts at a young age. And I hate the kids (and parents not doing a good job) putting on airs without politeness.

   I have two specific personal examples about a couple kids that could use a good spanking. The first was this past summer when I took a class trip overseas. One girl, "Brianna," went with her mother, and the attitude the girl had was absolutely shocking! She made snappy comments, complained literally all day, and blamed her mom for everything that didn't go in her favor. Eventually, I lost it and snapped a comment right back at her when she was disrespecting her mother (Brianna was complaining about how she was tired of taking pictures). Another time was also during summer vacation when I went to Newport Beach with my cousins. We were walking on the boardwalk, and a group of about 5 preteens was walking towards us. And rather than politely say "excuse me" to get past us, one boy yelled "Beep beep!" and shoved through. I turned around and yelled, "It's called saying excuse me!" (My brother and older cousins wanted to go back and give them a good whupping; shame they're older than 18.) Do kids not know the meaning of the words "manners", "respect", and "politeness"? How do they have the nerve, the GALL to be that disrespectful? Have they no shame? Do they really think they're hot stuff? That they can walk around with their "swagger" and do whatever, say whatever they want? NEWSFLASH! They're not! And I really want to just slap some sense into them because it's infuriating. 

Why Do We Fear the Unknown?

   Even as a little kid, I've been scared of the dark. But why? Darkness is just the absence of light. As I grew up, I realized that I wasn't necessarily afraid of the dark; I'm frightened of what lurks in the dark, what creeps in the shadows. I don't know what could be out there, what dangers lie in the umbrage. And although I'm more disturbed by the possibility that someone is hiding and can jump out at me, I still don't know what the darkness hides, so I'm apprehensive about venturing into it.
   And while this is only one example, why do we fear the unknown? (And don't try to deny it; on some level everyone fears the unknown.) We like knowing what's going to happen, what actual is hiding behind the corner. We take comfort in the knowledge of what's out there. Our minds like to make things fit, like to make sense out of things, always try to see the picture or make out a familiar shape. We feel uncomfortable in a situation we are unsure about, and we need to make sense out of it. And a lot of this is why it's so hard for us to make changes in our lives, especially career changes. We don't know how it'll turn out and it scares us. Taking that first jump, that leap of faith is the hardest. How will it turn out? I don't know. We find comfort in familiarity so anything that is not makes us stop and wonder. Not knowing is unsettling, unnerving.
   I think a lot of us fear death (myself included) because 1) obviously we want to still live, and 2) because we don't know what will happen to or become of us. (For the religious folks out there, you have it worked out.) In life, we have things ending all the time (projects, days, conversations) but we always know that they'll come up again in the future. The finality of death scares us. We are unsure of what happens next (or doesn't). Life is basically like a schedule: wake up, eat, go to work or school, come home, eat, sleep, and repeat. So when our schedule is in jeopardy of death- the fact that we won't have a schedule anymore, so to speak- or in jeopardy of just not being a schedule anymore, we are alarmed because we don't know what to do or how to react.
   Admittedly, I fear the unknown. I like knowing what's going to happen. I prefer to have control over my own situations or those that affect me. Unfamiliarity is uncomfortable to me- and to many others, I'm sure. And death frightens me as well. I think about what will happen. What will become of my mind? My spirit? All these questions that don't have answers shake me.
   And yet, through all of this, the unknown yields something exciting. Anticipation and the guessing can be fun. So I suppose it's all about finding a happy medium, or balancing out the excitement and fear. Because in reality, all of the future is the unknown. And we can't be scared forever, right?

Vocabulary #3

Vocab list #3

What Is A Hero?

   "Working hard is important. But there is something that matters even more, believing in yourself." -Harry Potter. Both Beowulf and Harry Potter are considered heroes of the time period in which their stories were written. But however similar they are in their respective accomplishments, they are still different in goals, motives, and personalities. Beowulf fought to gain glory and maintain it, while Harry Potter was thrust into the hero role to defeat the most feared villain of all time, Voldemort. Nonetheless, Beowulf and Harry Potter exemplify the heroes of the respective time periods in which they were written through their actions, intentions, and conduct.

Will Study for Food (& a Stream of Consciousness Rant)

  Can I just go off on a little rant about the idea of going to college? Okay, thanks. According the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, about 66% of high school graduates continue with education and enroll in college. To be honest, I thought that number would be lower, but that's beside the point. For most people, what other choice is there after high school besides college? These days, it seems like the only way you can be successful is to go to college to continue studies in a more funneled and narrowed down way; and even then, about 17% of college grads are still unemployed. Why did these poor kids go through all the schooling and money just to end up unemployed? It makes me wonder (and I'm sure it makes them wonder) what the point of all that was.
   There are seldom opportunities for success without going to college. It seems like the only way to be successful without a college degree is by learning a manual labor skill, like automotive technician, or getting lucky and hitting it big in Hollywood. Why is it so hard these days to find a stable job without excessive amounts of education? I know that education is key, that obviously you need the knowledge to do your respective job well. But still, why is it so hard to find something that 1) makes you happy but 2) still makes enough money for you to live well? Because let's face it: money is the driving force of any economy and without it, you won't survive for very long. My mom has told me that work places are raising starting to hire only those with a Master degree. The outrage! It really makes me sit down and think if it's all really worth it, if the money and the schooling is all really worth it. What is the world coming to when a college student has to pay about $20- to $30,000 for college that, even then, won't qualify him/her for a job after graduation?
   Sometimes college seems less and less appealing when I think about the cost. It irks me that it costs so much; it aggravates me that each field is becoming more and more competitive, that I'll have to spend even more money on more schooling just to qualify; it angers me that I feel out of options, that college is the only path I can take to be successful.
    And why is it so expensive? Why are books so expensive? Why is the actual tuition so high? Why can't the government help more to pay for all this? Why can't it understand that we need help and that by helping us, we can help the government in turn? Not to get too much into politics and economics, but the middle class really does suffer the most. We're too rich to get financial aid like the poor people, and we're definitely not rich enough to cruise by and pay full tuition like it's no big deal. (And the concept of lower class/ unemployment/ all the financial aid going to them is a completely different rant.) I'm sick and tired, as all other middle class citizens are, of getting the short end of the stick. I have such mixed feelings about college: should I go? what could I do if I didn't? it costs so much money, but it's worth it right? where would I go after high school if I didn't go to college? I don't know. Too many thoughts, too much stream of consciousness. I don't want to deal with this right now.

Vocabulary #2

Vocabulary list #2

My University

  Class without Preston was quite... (to be quite honest, the first word that comes to mind is "liberating" but that connotes a prison-like environment when he's here) relaxing. It was very laid-back and easy, although I did feel a sense of missing instruction or didacticism. Preston always has a way of teaching the class something new without trying. But I enjoyed the simple day nonetheless by leisurely writing in my journal and chatting amongst friends. The journal prompt proved slightly more challenging to answer as I had never thought of language that way. But it was interesting.
  I sat in a group with Imanie and Melissa, and we discussed summer plans and trips. We all have very busy summers ahead of us, all of which include going out of the country. We talked about plans, itineraries, the financial struggles of course, and just the overall fun and enjoyment of our trips abroad. We also talked about birthdays and births, pregnancy. Really random stuff. I completed my response to the journal prompt with a few minutes to spare at the end of class. So today was a very easy day.

Tristia and Beowulf- Book Notes pg. 31- 60

Tristia- Book 10

• Been in Pontus [present-day Turkey] for 3 years having been exiled ("Danube [river] has has frozen thrice over"); away from his country long enough for Troy to be attacked by Grecian Army
• Time passes too slowly; seems like Mother Nature is trying to make time feel long and dragged out
• Native Scythians live terribly, w/plundering men, everything is dangerous, scarcely defended city; everyone always wary & watchful
• Barbarians took over half the houses
• Tristia is the foreigner, forced to use hand gestures to communicate; made fun of for speaking Latin

Beowulf

• A powerful monster living in darkness and pain, growling at the happiness above him
• Conceived by a pair of monsters born of Cain, exiled and split into all evil
• Sneaked into the room at night, snatched 30 men, smashed them & ran w/ their bodies; those that escaped were those who fled

From Legend to History- Book notes pg. 4-14

My Opinion Isn't (A) Right

I thought the discussion in class had some really... eye-opening points or topics that needed to be addressed. I think that Noah had a fine point in bringing up the pursuit to happiness, that if he wanted to do heroine and become a prostitute, he should be able do so to because it's his body. And I certainly agree; if someone wants to damage his body by doing drugs, then by all means, let him self implode. That's his decision and his doing. The only problem comes when he becomes a danger to others. I also have a problem with drug users when they rush into the hospital with drug problems and can't cover the medical costs, so average citizens like my parents have to pay for them with taxes. It's like we're paying for this guy to do drugs. This will sound harsh, but just let the guy go, let him ruin himself and die if he accidentally does so. He knows what he's doing; he's made his choice. It's his fault for doing that to himself.
But this is getting way off topic. Getting back to the right to our opinion (or lack there of), I agree that just saying, "I have the right to my opinion" is just a person's last shot to fire, his last line because he has no other defense. He's just saying that to shut down the argument, to make up for the fact that he has no other come back, no other evidence to support his opinion.
But on the other hand, an opinion is just a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge. So why can't everyone have their own opinion? their own judgment? That's one of our rights as human beings. Now some countries can and cannot allow their citizens to express their judgment out loud, but people have them nonetheless, in their minds. So doesn't that let me have a right to my own opinion? If you say that I can't because I have to back it up with knowledge or evidence, I can say that I don't need to because opinions don't need evidence to support them. It's just an opinion, not some crazy fact I made up that I'm trying to make everyone believe. My opinion is my own perspective, stance, viewpoint, whatever you want to call it. But it's still mine, and I can think what I want to think. I don't need facts to support what I'm thinking, what my opinion is. "I think yellow is the best color." That's my opinion. Evidence? "It's a bright, happy color that is reminiscent of nice things like flowers and the sun." But that's still my opinion. A lot of people probably don't think that 1) yellow is a happy color, 2) that flowers and the sun are nice things. So even the evidence, it seems like, is just your opinion too. Your opinions support your opinion. Because opinions aren't based or supported by facts or actual knowledge. Why do you think they're called opinions?
I think that it's acceptable to say "I have the right to my own opinion" after you try to show your point, make your case. But if the person retaliates and shuts you down saying "No, that's wrong", then there's no point arguing because that person's close-minded and isn't open to what you're saying, because that person saying that my opinion is wrong is his opinion. He can't prove that my judgment not based on fact is wrong because there are no facts to check. So we both have opinions; he's just less open to mine than I am to his.

Vocabulary #1

Vocabulary list #1

Reflections on Week 1

1. I don't think internet access will inhibit my learning experience. I have enough self control to stay off my phone, and the class is interesting enough to keep me engaged. But I do think that the large number of students will make learning and expressing thoughts slightly difficult. Since so many of us have our own opinions and perspectives (and some more than others, the opportunists I guess, express them more often), being able to give your two cents might be a bit tough. 
2. I think my best learning experience wasn't necessarily a typical "learn from the book" type of class. I consider my best learning experience to be the painting class I took as a junior with Dr. Del Rio. I learned how to express myself through my art, to paint my feelings and let them speak for themselves. And while I was in a typical classroom setting, I still felt free to do whatever I wanted, to paint whatever came to mind, whatever gave me inspiration. My friend Taylor Wall sat next to me, which was nice because otherwise I would've had no friends in that class. That class taught me how to think freely and unfettered. I realized what was happening when I almost always disregarded an assignment from Del Rio for something else I wanted to do instead, which she encouraged; I realized that I can do whatever makes me happy, to not take orders from anybody, to not be restricted. Let my mind flow creatively.
3. I am most excited about perhaps learning a completely new method or concept. I want my mind to be blown away. And while those standards are high, I think they'll be met. Honestly, I think I have a very short-sighted perspective, not fully seeing the opportunities that are out there for me to grab. And I think this class will help me see, find, and take them, and help me realize my potential. 

Stream of Consciousness or Prim & Proper

Sometimes when a person tells a story, he goes to fast, tripping over his words because there are so many thoughts in his head that he can't get them straight. Too many thoughts are jumbled in the mind, all rushing to get out. Stream of consciousness works that way. All the thoughts need to be written down as fast as they can so that the mind doesn't lose them. And yet all these jumbled thoughts only give a glimpse into the mind. Like David Foster Wallace said in his story "Good Old Neon," what goes on inside the brain is too fast and big to do more than sketch the basics of what happens in a single instance. The essays that Michel Montaigne wrote about various subjects follow that format: a slew of thoughts written down so fast, only giving a small window into the mind of Montaigne. And yet Pride and Prejudice author Jane Austen is able to properly and concisely write her books, methodically come up with the right words to use, putting them in an orderly way. While Montaigne writes in more of a "stream of consciousness" fashion, Austen writes with more planning and forethought, making sure everything is exactly the way it needs to be.

Senior Resume

Alyssa Oh

Address*

Santa Maria CA, 93455

Phone number*

Email*

Objective:

I plan to move ahead with my education to pursue a degree in environmental science and conservation. 

Academic Status:

GPA: 4.4                                                                                                                   Class rank: 12/514

Student Activities: 

• Interact Club (2011- present)
• Project Humanity (2013- present) 
• Special Olympics (2013- present)
• Track & Field (varsity 2011- present)
• Soccer (junior varsity 2012- 2013)
• CSF

Community Activities: 

• Interact Club- served food at the homeless shelter
• Project Humanity- helped set up for the Christmas parade, served food at homeless shelter
• Special Olympics- assisted tennis coach, helped set up for Regional and State Olympics
• Santa Barbara City College (summer 2012)- handed out lunches to underprivileged kids, aided in set up of Relay for Life

Special Awards: 

• Honor roll (every semester 2011- present)
• Scholar athlete (every spring (2011- present)
• Academic letter (every spring (2011- present)
• Varsity letter (track & field, sophomore year)
• Recipient of Renaissance 4.0 and above (2011- present)
• Perfect score on math and English California Exit Exam

1987 AP Exam

1. C

2.      E --- A
3.      C
4.      C --- E
5.      D
6.      D
7.      A --- E
8.      B
9.      A ---E
10.  B --- C
11.  D
12.  A --- A
13.  B
14.  D --- C
15.  A

A World with No Choices

  Today I saw the movie The Giver with my friend Caitlin. It was a good movie, even greater book. To give a brief summary, The Giver is about a boy named Jonas living in a world where everything is under control; there is no war or pain or fear, everything is the same. But it got me thinking: what is a world without choices? How do we live in a world that is all the same? Is true, complete happiness and love worth giving up if war and starvation and suffering are gone too?
   In the book, there are no hills, no colors, no weather, no uniqueness. In return, there is no agony, no fighting, no jealousy, discomfort, etc. The chief of the community that Jonas lives in says, "When people have the freedom to choose, they choose wrong." But we still have the right to choose, even if it is completely wrong. Who gets to be powerful enough to make the final decision that gets rid of music, race, holidays, discrimination, pleasure? Who gets to say that there will be no more freedom, even if it is in return for perfection?
   While there is no pain and war (and no memory that the citizens have of it), there is still no individualism, praise, love, beauty. Is it really worth it to get rid of pain and war for the price of all that? The butterflies you get when you see your crush walking down the halls, the euphoria new parents experience when their child is born, the exhilaration of riding down the hill on a sled. All these positive feelings are lost, not experienced. And that's a shame. The amount of hurt in this world is balanced out, if not overpowered, by the camaraderie, love, beautiful emotion. Isn't it worth it to feel true happiness? To feel... real feelings?
   All the bad emotions and feelings (jealousy, fear, anxiety, hatred) are a part of life. Suffering comes with being born. Who gets to say what the breaking point is when the world needs to be rid of all that? What is life without color (my favorite is yellow, by the way), options, creativity, expression of self? That is not life; that is not living. Sameness is a despicable way to be. The hurt we put on the world and the people around us is forgiven by the kindness, understanding, erasure of racial boundaries, pleasure, love. We have the right to make our own choice- really, we do. If we choose wrong, to put it simply (and less eloquently), that sucks. And we suffer the consequences. But we learn, and that just comes with humans being able to make their own decisions. If we choose right, then that is wonderful and beneficial to every one us.
   We should be able to to live our free, happy lives, full of choices. One where we can express ourselves- whether it be through art, music, religion, writing, etc. I don't think there should ever come a time when everything turns to sameness. True pleasures of life are not worth getting rid of for lack of war, starvation, discrimination. Then it's not life; you're not really living. You're merely existing. Religion, family, friendship, love. Those are what make life worth living, what make all the bad stuff worth it.

The Bond Between Siblings

  According to Brandy Zadrozny from "The Daily Beast" news website, around 18% of married women only have one child. And from my perspective of having two (older) siblings, I feel... not necessarily bad, but I wish these only children know what it's like to have siblings because it's a great thing. When you have siblings (whether older or younger), you have someone to play, someone to annoy (whether you're older or younger), and someone to love and share a special connection with. The bond between siblings is indescribable. They connect on a level so much deeper than even the best of friends have. Siblings grow up together, know each other's secrets, share inside jokes, and always have each other's back.

Poetry #1

1. The commercial borrows the poem from Charles Bukowski, called "The Laughing Heart".
2. The use of the poem might be considered ironic because it says "don't let [your life] be clubbed into dank submission. Be on the watch." And yet that's exactly what the commercial is trying to do to the viewer, trying to convince the audience to by the product. 
3. After reading the summaries of a few of Bukowski's novels, I've come to the conclusion that "The Laughing Heart does reflect his reputation. Bukowski's books are about his alter ego Henry Chinaski living life with no forethought, no set plans for the future, and thus suffering for his slacking off. "The Laughing Heart" is about living life to the fullest, with no compliance to anyone or anything.  
4. I found the answer to question #1 by Googling "Levi's Go Forth Poem", and the actual poem and author came up as a result. I found the answer to #3 by researching some of Bukowski's books and reading a short summary on each of them. I linked a common theme throughout all of them, and upon rereading "The Laughing Heart", I discovered that it too had relatively the same theme. 

Essay #1

All humans have a tendency to become accustomed to routine; it's just human nature. Adjusting to being ripped out of the norm is a tough process, one that is not always received with warm welcomes. Some have a better time than others at the adjusting process. Leah Price is a fourteen year-old tomboy from Georgia who worships her father, Nathan Price, and blindly follows his faith. She has grown accustomed the posh (compared to African) lifestyle, like all Americans do. And when she and her family are forced to move to Africa for Nathan's mission trips, she does not make a smooth transition.